Distraction for a newshound

I'm not so much a newshound, I guess, as a newsbitch. My beat is what goes on at Parliament House in Canberra and you'll often see me asking the hard questions at press conferences there. Everyone knows my newspaper, even if they pretend to never read it. The paper is often derisively called The Daily Lemonsuck and I guess I'm one of the chief juice extractors.
Lately though, I've been distracted.
It is all the fault of a British soldier cum mercenary cum adventure travel operator named Major Jeremy Billycock-Smythe. What a name, eh? He's as pretentious as he sounds too.
But he knows how to play the system, knows all the "right" people, and schedules press conferences when the pollies aren't around knowing full well that we press gallery people have nothing better to do than attend.
My first dealing with Major Billycock-Smythe came some months ago when he announced he was starting tours for adventure tourists to war zones. Can you believe that? The sicko!
He got spades of publicity though. I'm afraid the media has no conscience.
They pay me very well to stir up politicians, but it's very hard to stick to my core business right now.
I see Kevin Rudd's government has introduced grocery-watch on top of petrol watch.
What we really need is a pollie-watch, don't you think, so people can go online and weigh up the relative merits at any given moment of K. Rudd and B. Nelson and the rest of them?
Or better still for me, perhaps someone can come up with Major BS-watch. I know that man is up to something but I just can't work it out yet. I will though. Mark my words.